Be Alive!

Dancers Among Us Project by Jordan Matter

“BE passionate joyful sad euphoric angry intense desperate ecstatic intimate present ALIVE.” Jordan Matter

Right now I’m sitting at the computer nursing my one and only cup of joe for the day and feeling happy (but moderately deprived). I’m thinking of all I am thankful for and excited for my day to unfold. I’m getting a facial this morning! Also walking the beach, getting my husband’s car an oil change, and seeing some clients at the spa.

How about you? Are you living life to its fullest? If not, why not? I don’t want to preach, judge, or lay a guilt trip on you – I’m just curious. (You know me.) Maybe you hate your job, have a relationship going bad – or no relationship at all – are sick or dealing with a chronic health condition. Could be you are out of work, have a wayward child, have experienced a betrayal, or are wrestling with an addiction. If the issue is clinical depression, that’s another ballgame.

And yes, there are seasons in life where things are just not OK for a while. What I’m wondering is “Are you living the life you want to live, and if the answer is no, are you willing to change that?”

My life was kind of tough growing up. Maybe yours was too. I’ve had to do lots of work to recover. Two of the lessons I’ve learned stand out. They both relate to the opening sentence of this post: “BE passionate joyful sad euphoric angry intense desperate ecstatic intimate present ALIVE.” I guess when you have to block bad stuff out to grow up and survive you end up blocking the good out too. Here’s my story of recovery:

In the early days of my massage career I did out-calls. I was asked to pack up my table and come to an island in Minnesota to do massage for “Wild Women’s Weekend.” I spent the weekend with a bunch of hysterical women. They were laughing, playing, joking around, and really enjoying themselves.

I was, of course, working and having a good enough time myself. But I had this niggling question: “How are they able to laugh so much?”

When I got home I decided to learn to laugh (I know, weird, right?) but true nonetheless. Imagine me sitting at the dinner table with my husband and four children practicing laughing out loud. Oh yeah, real funny, huh? But, I did it! I learned how to laugh out loud, and even if I sometimes forget to laugh (which I often do), it’s like riding a bike: One never really forgets how.

The other lesson I had to teach myself is to be angry, out loud. My husband was a great role model – lol. Once I gave myself permission to express anger (I was about 35), he suddenly became much less angry. I guess he was doing my anger for me – geez!

To be fully present and live the life you were meant to live, you need to recover those lost parts of yourself. Those parts you had to cut out to survive. Reclaim your sense of wonder and joy, let yourself feel desperation and anger, follow your passion, let your inner-child out to play.

And next time you get to work, try doing the splits on two desks, I double dare ya. 😀

See you at the new spa!